Components of a Magical Night

» 20 April 2006 » In Game, Guide, Nightlife »

Components of a Magical Night

“You the watch on my wrist
The ice in my ring
Bling Bling look at the diamonds in my chain
My iced out jewelry, I love you

You my new Desert Eagle
My glock when I aim
All you hear is shoot em up bang bang
My fully loaded pistol, I love you

Work like a slave, eat like a king
We do it for the love of material things
I am going to show this industry the definition of a buzz
By the way that’s word to everything I love

I love doing shows hearing the fans when they clap
And I love you back
I love having fun, love a good party
Bartender, Crystal for everybody!”

—–Select lyrics from “Love is a Battlefield, by Papoose (G Manifesto Certified underground track of the week)

First of all, what is a “Magical Night”? A Magical Night is when everything falls in line perfectly. Like when you step into the joint and every fly girl is loving you. You might even have to tell some girls to “stop staring”. It’s when your energy is so positive that even the haters call you “The Peoples Champ”. Its when competition you just devour, like a pitbull against a chiwawa. It’s when a famous Italian designer comes up to you, tells you he loves your “style”, introduces a model girl named Briana to you and excuses himself to talk to other people. It’s when you you’re at a Grammy party and you can’t decide whether to roll with a singer girl with a deal or one of the showgirls to entertain. It’s when Game recognizes Game. It’s when you don’t even have to use your Desert Eagle tucked into the back of your Canali slacks. Its when a sometimes model daughter of a Eastern European Oligarch steps to you and gives you a key to her hotel room, and you haven’t had your third Grey Goose and Soda yet. Its when you wish could clone yourself to help swoop all the girls that are down. Magical Nights are what we all live for. Its no secret that I have had more Magical Nights than anyone deserves. But it is not just a function of luck. There is actually a method to having Magical Nights. Here are the Components of a Magical Night:

1. Preparation. The key to a good night is having a good day. Get out and about. Spit some street game or some west coast car game out the Cadillac DeVille. Feel the streets. Get some backup leads for the evening. Get some frontups to. Number Crunch. Shoot a text blaster. Get the pendulum swinging. Be well rested. Get in a Vampire Nap. Get a work out on. I personally like to spar a few rounds (and when you’re as quick as me you never get a mark on your face). Hit the heavy bag. The speed bag too. Think young Roberto Duran. Or Sugar Ray (and I don’t mean that crappy band from Orange County).

2. Be really positive. This is easier said than done. But regardless, get yourself in a good mood. Everyone is a little different. I usually start my day off on a positive note by tossing out the girls from the night before saying I have to catch a plane. Once they leave, I usually get a little shut eye. This early morning shut eye is usually more than decent. You should look into it. Music helps a lot. I usually have Curtis Mayfield’s “Superfly” playing in my head at all times. Hip Hop obviously works as well. Just make sure it has a tight beat, a fresh sample, and the MC is lacing a good flow………….

3. Gear. After taking a good shower and enjoying a good dose of Aquatherapy, call down to the front desk of the Ritz-Carlton and have them send up a bottle of Goose and some Krug, Clos du Mesnil 1995 sent up to your $750 per night room (don’t skimp on the room, you wanted to have a Magical Night, right?) Throw on a robe and light up a smoke. Get your head right. Get dressed. For me, suits just appear on my body. Put together a good combination. I like going with a Custom Zegna Black 3-Button, Black Borelli Sea Island Cotton shirt, white, blue, pink, red, black striped custom Zegna Tie (don’t even look for this one, Ann Zegna gave me the only one ever made) and light blue Brioni pocket square. Go with the kind of outfit that could pick up girls on its own. Go through your Checklist for a Night Out. And of course, carry an extremely thick Bankroll.

4. Get an early jump on the night. Get out on the streets. Smell, taste, and breathe the streets. This is the foundation remember. Get your flow going. If someone needs it, diss someone. Sacrificing to the player Gods is never a bad move. Deliberate sacrifice for deliberate gain. This will help you tap into your natural human instinct of a natural born killer. American Indians used to use Vision Quests to tap into their self in the Animal Kingdom. I just so happen to be the Wolf.

5. Planning. To have a Magical Night, you don’t necessarily need to plan every step of the night. Oftentimes, Magical Nights happen when there is little or no planning. Either way, you want to maximize your odds and be in the right place. For instance, a dive bar in Tulsa is going to be an extremely hard place to have a Magical Night. On the other hand, a Ford Model party in South Beach in February is going to make it a lot easier on yourself. So like any good Commodity Broker, watch the “moving averages” and the “Stochastics”. Buy low and sell high. Get into the trade Before it moves.

6. Oysters. Get a good meal on. Something relatively light. There is a reason the Spanish eat Tapas. Carpaccio is always a good move. Some Foie Gras never hurt anyone either (except maybe the Duck). Instalata Caprese is always a decent start to an evening, or some medallions of Wild Boar or Quail Eggs. Steak Tartare is a classic. Or some Poached Kobe bone marrow with warm truffle vinaigrette emulsion. You get the point. But Oysters are definitely the key. Raw clams too. Eat a half doz before the meal with three raw clams and a half doz at the end of the meal with three raw clams. 6+3+6+3= Magical Night. Bookend the meal. And fuck those Kumamoto Oysters. I typically drop ship New Orleans Oysters to wherever I am going. Just in case.

7. The X factor. This is that certain “Glow” you have sometimes when you go out. The Swagger. If I told you how to get this, you’d be as clever as me………….. The Rest is Up to You.

Emails of the week in regards to How to Get the Girl of Your Dreams:

“How sad. If you are real people, you are terrible writers. If you are writers creating semi-fiction, you have atrociously poor grammar (and spelling AND punctuation). You should have called this “How to Get the Dumbest Girl of Your Dreams”.”

——–Hey, I am never one to hold a girls intelligence against her. In fact, intellectual conversations sometimes make my head hurt. And I have never tried to be the next Ernest Hemmingway. I am fairly certain you don’t capitalize “AND” in the middle of a sentence. Get back to me on that. Thanks Skippy……MPM

Email in regards to The Smoking Gun:

“I heard of the attempt on your life, but you can’t kill a ghost. Funny the on the news they talked of your prominence but never showed your face, you’re a political genius!!! This piece makes me want to walk into Aubergiene and put a cigarette out on the owners cheek. I smoke 2 packs a day and my lung feels great. Try being a potsie like me Fisto, you could smoke in the oval office on TV if you wanted to b/c of who you are, but I can’t even light a match in the Stingaree bathroom, so I have to deal with all the pinstriped fugazzi’s gawking at my rancid ass when I try and discreetly slip out of the stall. Bastards.”

Michael Porfirio Mason
AKA The Peoples Champ
AKA El Magico
AKA The Man with a Dream
AKA The Man on the Rise
AKA To take nothing and make it something
The Guide to Getting More out of Life

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12 Comments on "Components of a Magical Night"

  1. The G Manifesto
    21/04/2006 at 2:35 pm Permalink

    this is one of the best yet. I like this one and how to get the girl of your dreams

  2. The G Manifesto
    Mindy Vega
    27/04/2006 at 12:30 am Permalink

    I love your writing, and I love papoose.

  3. The G Manifesto
    Anita Laurie Stevens
    27/04/2006 at 10:43 pm Permalink

    what do you think of the Bentley Continental CGT?

  4. The G Manifesto
    03/05/2006 at 9:01 pm Permalink

    I thank you for the compliment and I hope you do not mind my unoriginal return of the favor with “your writing is loved by me as well.”

  5. The G Manifesto
    Katie Lohmann
    26/05/2006 at 2:10 pm Permalink

    this is hilarious!

  6. The G Manifesto
    Point & Shoot
    14/06/2006 at 4:03 pm Permalink

    Another Great G Manifesto. you are The Peoples Champ.

  7. The G Manifesto
    20/06/2006 at 4:56 pm Permalink

    you should write one on how to pick up chicks

  8. The G Manifesto
    27/06/2006 at 7:52 pm Permalink

    What do you think of Palms Place in Las Vegas?

  9. The G Manifesto
    18/10/2006 at 11:56 pm Permalink

    Picked up Danielle Gamba and Tanisha Jones last weekend. also melanie iglesias. on a roll

  10. The G Manifesto
    The G Manifesto
    21/02/2007 at 3:55 pm Permalink

    Palms is wack. Too many guys in beenies with tribal tattoos. Orange county in vegas.

  11. The G Manifesto
    Roxy Deville & Jaclyn Case
    01/10/2007 at 6:16 am Permalink

    you are hot

  12. The G Manifesto
    Shirley Temple
    13/02/2009 at 1:53 am Permalink

    Very beautifully written. Straight words but a fascinatingly strange title.

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