First Night In Riga, Latvia
First Night In Riga, Latvia
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After London Fashion Week, I get off the plane from London, Stansted in Riga, Latvia. It’s raining, late and mad cold. Or at least its cold for me, someone who’s coldest night in the last few years has been a summer night in San Diego.
Cab to the hotel, unpack, try to get some Internet set up and head down to lobby. I am starving.
“Any good spots to eat around here?”, I ask the Latvian kids working the front desk at my pretty smooth, pseudo-boutique hotel.
“It’s kind of late. There is not too many places open late on a Tuesday. Maybe you try McDonald’s?”, says the Latvian hotel lobby cat.
“McDonald’s? That’s it? What about some late night Latvian grinds?”, I respond.
“No, I think just McDonald’s.” Konstantine says.
“F*ck”, I say to myself.
“Ok, do you have a map?”, I say.
So I get a map and start walking in the rain in the Old City of Riga looking for something other than McDonald’s to grind on.
I walk a few blocks pass a few shady bars (that actually look pretty decent, but I am ‘gry) and actually find something that seems open. And it looks Latvian. Smooth.
I walk up to the restaurant, and some Russian cat starts toward me.
I think he is going to tell me that the restaurant is closed or something, but instead, the drunk Russian fool grabs my shoulders!
I don’t really like people putting their paws on my butter soft leather jacket, and I am not in the mood for any pleasantries, so I use Russian homeboy’s momentum and judo throw him to the ground where he slips over and over again, slow-motion style, on the wet cobble stones.
He tries to get up, slips again and finally backs away as I keep my eye on him and his buddy across the street as I stay ready like The Dragon.
I have been sparing tons lately, and both Russian cats can see that I am not amenable to any traditional Latvian dance lessons, or whatever the f*ck they wanted, so they both split, yapping in Russian. Or maybe its Latvian. I can’t really tell.
I think to myself, that if they are going to get more friends, I don’t really care. If they want a rematch, I am Game, but I want to do it on a full stomach.
So I head into the restaurant and get some Latvian grinds. Not bad. Some kind of dumpling, ravioli type trips. Forget the name.
After the Latvian eat-on, I kick back a little sipping my Cesu beer, when two fly Latvian girls, one blonde, one brunette walk in to pick up some food to-go. They check me out.
The girls pay for their food, go outside, and spark up a smoke outside the door. The blonde Latvian girl smiles at me through the glass door. I don’t need anymore of an invitation, so I pound my Cesu and say “What up” to the meitenes.
“Why you speak in English?”, Christina says. (The first of five girls named “Christina” I would meet in Latvia.)
“I am from California. American.” I say. (As I heard it is important for girls not to think you are from England in Latvia).
“Oh, good.” Both Latvian girls say. Although the reaction is more of a “Oh, good.”, like “Ok“. Not a pre-George Bush “Oh, good.” which ment “Cool, I am really interested in getting to know you and swoop you”.
Regardless, I look brutally handsome in the butter soft leather, so the girls are down.
After a bunch of back and forth banter, they pitch me on some spots to roll out to, but I just play it smooth and just Number Crunch Christina.
Been in Riga less than a half hour and did a judo throw and got a fly girls number. Hell, I haven’t even taken a shower and I don’t even have a SIM card yet.
I think Riga is my kind of town.
Click Here for The G Manifesto’s Gentleman’s Club Report
Click Here 007 Lifestyle – Living Like James Bond!
The Rest is Up to You…
Michael Porfirio Mason
AKA The Peoples Champ
AKA GFK, Jr.
AKA The Sly, Slick and the Wicked
AKA The Voodoo Child
The Guide to Getting More out of Life
http://www.thegmanifesto.com
Naomi – How Many Loves
14/10/2010 at 1:32 pm Permalink
Ha, that is some James Bond shit. You’ve inspired me to start reading up and planning a trip to Riga. I hope you have a lot more to share, as this aspiring-G tries to plot his logistics…
14/10/2010 at 1:50 pm Permalink
For 2 points, solve the following analogy problem:
G Manifesto => Judo Throw as
Austin Powers => ?
Answer (in reversed text): pohcodujsirewsnaeht
14/10/2010 at 2:15 pm Permalink
Dagonet,
Yeah, tons of Data Sheets on Riga in the pipe.
– MPM
14/10/2010 at 5:12 pm Permalink
MPM,
Smooth. Hand-to-hand combat is critical for every international playboy.
Ain’t all white picket fences out there.
Keep it flowin’ like Cristal in the Boom Boom Room.
14/10/2010 at 5:32 pm Permalink
I hear Riga is a bit “rough” — meaning lots of shady, broke ass local guys who make a living ripping off foreigners on the prowl for Latvian girls
Would be good to get your overall take on the place.
14/10/2010 at 6:24 pm Permalink
I will have to swing by Riga on my next trip to my homeland of Poland. The former Eastern Bloc has yet to have that American culture fully creep in like the rest of Europe, but like you said it won’t be too long before that changes.
Next time maybe say you’re Canadian and see how they react? Might have something to do with Canada lifting visa restrictions for some of these Eastern European countries, so they’re showing us lots of love. While Bush tried to build that missile-shield which caused all sorts of tension with the the former Eastern Bloc and Russia.
14/10/2010 at 7:16 pm Permalink
I am not surprised that they are not particularly fond of the UK. Riga is a stag do haven. Or as the yanks call it bachelor party. Copious amounts of money has been pumped into the sex industry in Riga especially. What is amazing about Latvia is the swedish rule in 17th century which probably explains why most of their women have blonde hair and blue eyes.
God Bless those swedes
14/10/2010 at 7:42 pm Permalink
Phillip Zardono,
Yeah, combat is a necessity there.
– MPM
14/10/2010 at 7:45 pm Permalink
Samurai,
Yeah, rough and tumble.
I am coming with heavy Data Sheets on Riga.
Exposing myths, scams, and breaking down the Holyfield.
– MPM
14/10/2010 at 7:46 pm Permalink
trader1987,
I would be interested to see how being Canadian goes over there.
– MPM
14/10/2010 at 7:47 pm Permalink
Rico Warsame,
There are mad blondes.
But surprisingly, there are stunners with black hair as well. Tons of them.
– MPM
15/10/2010 at 8:59 am Permalink
You’re certainly off to a great start!
15/10/2010 at 9:19 am Permalink
:yawn: …Any female naive enough to get duped by what it would seem as some hack pick-up artist has some serious misfires in their brain synapses. Don’t you ever get tired of taking advantage of the mentally retarded members of the fairer sex? Just saying.
15/10/2010 at 9:39 am Permalink
I love the Jet Black Eastern Euros Ones with crystal eyes just does something to me…
15/10/2010 at 9:59 am Permalink
Jason,
Yeah, it gets a little uglier.
– MPM
15/10/2010 at 10:02 am Permalink
Bernadette,
“Don’t you ever get tired of taking advantage of the mentally retarded members of the fairer sex?”
No. As long as they are fly.
I don’t mind the smart ones either. As long as they are fly.
– MPM
15/10/2010 at 10:02 am Permalink
International Swagger,
You and me both.
Deadly.
– MPM
15/10/2010 at 12:39 pm Permalink
I hear Riga is the “worst” of the Baltic capitals in terms of pissed off unemployed local losers and scams. What made you pick Riga instead of Tallinn or Vilnius?
15/10/2010 at 12:46 pm Permalink
Samurai,
Its kind of funny, I asked everyone I know before I went and they all claimed Riga. I didn’t care which one I was going to.
Now that I am back everyone is saying I should have gone Tallinn or Vilnius.
Typical. Ha.
– MPM
15/10/2010 at 2:15 pm Permalink
Keep them coming G. Already been there but great to hear some fresh perspective.
15/10/2010 at 9:29 pm Permalink
You going to Riga is no contest. I had girls checking me out there on my first visit, back when I was a total nerd (I am still a total nerd, but don’t look it anymore). I went back again last year. The difference was pretty striking – even four years ago there were tons more hotties. I think everyone is trying to leave.
17/10/2010 at 7:07 am Permalink
A) I’ve been to Riga and the women were porn star/playboy model gorgeous. The girl that served us at mcdonalds could have walked off the pages of playboy. That hot. Also, she was average from what I saw my 2 weeks there.
B) don’t feed us that “I coulda fucked her if I wanted to” bullshit. It’s a tired excuse I’m seek of seeing from wannabe players
17/10/2010 at 9:38 am Permalink
pepini,
Tons more coming.
Commander Top Rock,
I have heard that before.
Nutz,
A) Playboy doesn’t do those girls justice.
B) I have never used the “I coulda fucked her if I wanted to” line before in my life, and I certainly didn’t here. Re-read.
– MPM
03/01/2012 at 9:43 pm Permalink
HA-HA-HA!
Americans subhumans posting here about Latvia. Can’t wait when you are all remix in us, your future look – monkey like Obama or mexicans.
Will see how many people with blue eye’s your are going to have in US in couple generations 🙂