2. On that note, always tell girls when they come to meet you to wear high heels and a skirt. If a girl meets me with Ugg Boots and skinny jeans, I don’t care how fly she is, I am ditching her. I have an image to uphold after all. And I have to draw the line somewhere.
3. Find a good spot. The beach. A park. An alley. A Mediterranean courtyard or Veranda. Use “views” to your advantage. Read A View To A Swoop, for a full breakdown.
4. Swoop. Just bust it out. Keep an eye out for Cops though. Especially in The California Police State.
21st Law: Play a Sucker to Catch a Sucker – Seem Dumber than your Mark
No one likes feeling stupider than the next person. The trick, is to make your victims feel smart – and not just smart, but smarter than you are. Once convinced of this, they will never suspect that you may have ulterior motives. – Robert Greene, The 48 Laws of Power
Many times when I swoop fly girls, I play dumb.
Here are some examples when playing dumb can be real smooth:
1. When you roll up to a nightclub you have on lockdown, say “what up” to the doorman and roll right in, many times girls will say, “Wow, I can’t believe you were able to get us in so quick. Did you see that line?”
You should then respond, “There was a line?”
2. When you are at a fly restaurant that you have on lockdown, and the dope Chef comes out to greet you and your date. Many times the girl will say, “Wow, that was so cool the Chef came out to greet us. He is famous right?”
You should then respond, “Was that the Chef? I thought that was the busboy.”
3. When you flash a ridiculous Bankroll to buy some drinks, the fly girl you are with will say, “Wow, why do you carry so much CASH on you?”
You should then respond, “Really? Is that not normal? I just was at the Del Mar Racetrack earlier today.”
4. When you are in Los Angeles and some famous actor guy comes up and gives you props, the fly girl you are with will say, “How do you know (Insert Weesh Actor Here)?
You should then respond, “He was an actor? I thought he was the waiter.”
5. When you are spitting Game to a fly girl that is really into brands and fashion, and she asks what kind of tie you are wearing and flips it over* to see the E. Marinella, and she says, “Wow, that’s a nice tie.”
You should then respond, “Is that a good brand of ties?”
On every Pick Up Artist’s “about page” on their blog it says something to the effect of:
“I used to be a dork with no Game. I couldn’t get a girl to save my life. Then one day I read The Game by Neil Strauss, and my whole life changed. Now buy my e-book and I will tell you how to get girls!”
On every Lifestyle Designer’s “about page” on their blog it says something to the effect of:
“I used to be a cubicle monkey and I hated my life. My whole existence was a corporate prison and I could never travel. Then one day I read The Four Hour Work Week by Tim Ferriss, and my whole life changed. Now buy my e-book and I will tell you how to be location independent!”
You can either go those above routes, or you can just skip the bullsh*t and read The G Manifesto, pro-bono.
“The gentle reader will never, never know what a consummate ass he can become until he goes abroad. I speak now, of course, in the supposition that the gentle reader has not been abroad, and therefore is not already a consummate ass. If the case be otherwise, I beg his pardon and extend to him the cordial hand of fellowship and call him brother.” – Mark Twain, The Innocents Abroad
However, like 6 or 7 years ago, one of my friends rolled over to my crib on New Years Eve and said, “We are rolling out tonight”.
I said, “You already know the only night I won’t go out during the year is New Years Eve. I have been out 12 of the last 14 nights swooping mad girls. Where were you? Don’t bring this weak sh*t to me”.
He responded, “You will want to go out tonight. Our friend XXXX has got this club locked down. Mad girls. We are rolling.”
I cracked a little, “No issues getting in?”
“None” he said.
“You sure you got it locked?”, I said.
“No doubt”, he said.
“Ok, let me call my driver. I am not f*cking around with catching cabs on New Years. Too many wack people out”.
Fast forward a few hours and we get to the club.
Full Mayhem. Fire Marshal there. I should have guess it.
“Call your boy, who has this place “on lock”. He should be able to get us in, right?” I told my friend.
Fast forward 10 min.
His buddy who supposedly had sh*t on lock came out of the club and said, “There is nothing I can do, I am really sorry Michael, Fire Marshall and all, I promise I will make it up to you.”.
I should have known. In fact, I did know, and I was almost frothing at the mouth.
“What should we do now?” my idiot friend said.
(Side note: my friend actually is smooth as f*ck. Real strong resume. Probably a top 50 player in all of America. Still, he was really throwing up airballs that night).
I take control of the night:
“We are going to my ‘Local Bar’ AKA The Gentleman’s Club that I have on lock. “I need a drink. Let me call my driver again.”
Fast forward 10 minutes.
We arrive at my Gentleman’s Club, slap five with the valets, say “what up” to the hostess girl (free entry of course) slap five with the bartender and settle in for a cocktail.
We both look around:
We are the only two customers in the place.
And about 18 dancers working.
9 girls to one. Solid ratio.
Let’s just say a we had better things on the agenda that night than a “New Year Kiss”.
One way to stop this from happening is to tell girls after you swoop them, that you “hate” celebrating holidays.
You see, girls are completely brainwashed by society and “love” holidays.
Ever met a girl that didn’t absolutely love the holidays? Yeah, me neither. They don’t exist.
Telling a girl that you “hate” holidays is somewhat like telling a little kid that the Easter Bunny isn’t real; it blows their whole foundation up.
After the shock waves settle, girls start viewing you as “not relationship material”, which is exactly what you want them to think.
And let’s face it, American Holidays are weesh.
Lets’ break a few of them down:
New Year’s Day/Eve – If you really want to party, you don’t need society to tell you when. And it’s better to do it on a day when every dork is partying and The Police State is in full force. New Years Eve very well could be the only night of the year where I won’t go out at night.
Thanksgiving Day – I like turkey as much as the next cat, and I love mashed potatoes like any good half Irish kid does, but I can have a big meal with my family anytime.
Christmas Day – If you really want to give a gift to someone, you can do it August 1st. Or March 12th. Or…you get the broken picture.
April Fool’s Day – Kind of funny. Also, kind of tired.
Chinese New Year – Maybe would be smooth if you were in Hong Kong or Macau or somewhere. In America? Weesh.
Cinco de Mayo – Phony holiday created by the beer companies. And I can’t stand Tequila (drank a whole bottle to the brain as a kid and I still can’t even smell the stuff). I will pass like Jim McMahon.
Halloween – If you are a “Monster” like Cody, everyday is Halloween.
St. Patrick’s Day – Green beer? Come on. And this is from someone who’s Father was born in Northern Ireland. Belfast.
Valentine’s Day – Might be the worst of the bunch.
This all being said, I do dig holidays in foreign countries. I love the week-long Spanish Festivals in Summertime. However, America is such a Police State that outside of Mardi Gras, we don’t have any week-long, all-night party holidays.
Travel Bum Show: The Cuba Prostitution Documentary
“Cuban women can take a compliment without sneering at you as though you offered them your entire soul.” – Andrew Lindy
A friend of mine recently sent me The Cuba Prostitution Documentary by Andrew Lindy.
This cat obviously has talent. It is pretty damn good.
It is not a documentary about “prostitution” Cuba per se (and I don’t mean Thomas Keller’s restaurant Per Se either), as in the guy pays money in exchange for sex, it is more about the cat trying to pick up girls in Cuba.
I have been thinking someone needs to do an Anthony Bourdain-style travel show for the swooping girls set.
It sometimes makes me wish I could get in front of a camera and bust something out. It would be probably the dopest video show on the Internet. But I never would for a host of reasons.